Archive for the ‘advice’ tag
Cheating Wives And Their Reasons For Cheating
Is Your Spouse REALLY Cheating?
When you’ve got a wife who had cheated on you, it is likely that you spent some time trying to identify the reasons for wives to cheat. What are those that pushed them to trade their marriage for something that is altogether temporary and unstable? What are those things that the other man has to offer that you have not provided her?
These are all excellent questions to ask when your wife cheats. These would be even better questions to know the answer to before your wife cheats.
One thing about this is that, there are more than one standard by which women are brought swooning on their knees and lining up to cheat on their husbands. Of course this is not a universal weakness that pushes women to cheat. But then, there are reasons common to the majority of women who cheat.
The following are only a few of the reasons by which women cheat.
1) It’s quite lonesome. Of course it’s not your fault that she is lonely. Women do devote significant time to work together with raising the kids. Once the children slowly start to be independent, they’d learn how detached they have been from the world and from you as well. That would be the time for which they get to be the most vulnerable to the appeal of another man who would lend them some attention that they are not getting at home and from the companionship they’ve found missing in their lives.
2) Satisfying the emotion. This is true. Women who cheat feel like they are deprived of emotional satisfaction in their own marriage. This is often the case for women who cheat that the men. Truth is, more than half the population of men who cheat admits that they are actually happy at home while only a third of those women cheaters can say the same.
3) She’s preparing herself mentally and physically for leaving. This is not always the case but there are enough instances where this is the case to be worth mentioning. That doesn’t mean this is the way your marriage has to end. Changes can be made that will bring her back into the fold but the sooner you make those changes the greater your odds of success in your marriage will be.
If men’s reason to cheat is usually because they get presented with the opportunity, women on the other hand get cautious and calculating when they get to decide to cheat. They would think it over and decide on taking the risk instead of just being swept away by the mood at the moment and allow the same to get it over their heads before acknowledging what it is that hit them.
What Should You Say To Your Cheating Ex Boyfriend To Win Him Back?
You want him back. You know the good, the bad, and the darned near impossible to handle about him and you still want him back. But, what should you say to your cheating ex boyfriend to win him back?
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There are about a million possible scenarios for what you could have, would have, might have, and want to say playing over and over in your mind. Aren’t there?
You might have already memorized those lines but probably if the perfect time comes and you’re in front of him, the words would just go away leaving you tongue tied.
And your plan A and B seemed to vanish only to find out that you needed plan Z. Take note that meeting with your ex can be very emotional. Seeing him might send the positive and the negative ions crashing together making the situation emotionally charged.
Get Rid of the Emotional Baggage
Getting over a broken heart and getting your ex back can be two opposing poles. They are different but the former won’t work without the latter. You may be so desperate to get him back that you’ve been bugging him every minute begging him to stay. But hey, that won’t work. If you really want your ex back and that he will want you too, keep a few days off all by yourself. Making plans with extra emotional baggage won’t take the relationship to where it should be.
Words said in tears or anger doesn’t have that same effect before. Even a sincere apology won’t sound sincere at all.
Put it in Writing
How do you remove the emotion from the conversation? For many people that would be like removing a tongue from a mouth. That would be a tricky and dangerous maneuver that might have unintended consequences.
An emotional meeting could ruin the original motive of the meeting. Instead of focusing on trying to make things up, you could end up digging into the wounds again and hurling back words you wouldn’t have said yourself.
An email or a text message won’t do him any good because it looks so distant and formal. Don’t be too flowery or too straightforward; neither like a novel or a mere one-liner punch line. Sit down and write what’s in your heart.
Get the Words Right
The real beauty of a handwritten note is that you can take your time to make sure that your words are just right. You want to make sure you say all the things you need to say to state your case and you can cross out or remove any words that seem counter-productive once you take the time to reread the note.
In this manner, what you write is something that is clear and right. Likewise, you’ll have all your time putting the right words in your letter. You cannot bring back what has been said and done but you can erase and edit what you wrote.
Of course you should never even dream of using the power of a letter like this to get your ex back until you know what your next move is going to be.
Don’t guess about what comes next. Have a proven plan in hand and ready to go when he calls you. I recommend following the same plan that has helped thousands of other couples just like you work things out: http://www.getyourexbacknow.com/just_break_up3.html. Free reprint avaialable from: What Should You Say To Your Cheating Ex Boyfriend To Win Him Back?.
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